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Well, for me I'd take issue with the refusal to be a gentleman. Some mormon girls are closeted freaks as someone here has already said. She went to BYU and did a 2 year mission, but since she was a girl she got to have a car instead of a bicycle. Full respect and care. But is it the path that will make you the happiest. Many Mormon girls place the cart before the horse. After a lot of thought during that relationship with a non-Mormon, I laid out exactly what struggles I was probably going to face: I was worried about my own faith. But it is important to be ruthlessly honest with yourself about how you feel about it.
Until you can believe someone else's beliefs are reasonable, you will not be able to treat them with the respect they deserve. Joanna mentioned that our theology is rich with opportunities for second chances. I know many of you understand how Im feeling and a lot of you have been there for many years already. I'm not complaining about the sex, but sometimes it prevents me from getting to know him better when we don't share any other bonding activities or get a chance to really talk. I agree she should be able to watch a movie or do her own research. Being married to a doctor is a difficult thing to balance. Sadly, the general consensus of "convert or nope out" sounds like what will end up happening. Like you, I didn't want to stress him out by giving him some sort of ultimatum or demands. I won't want to start the whole process again just because its convenient for my partner.